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  • Stuart Chant

Do you support or shift conversations?


Lady Randolph Churchill (Winston Churchill's mother) described dining separately with two English Prime Ministers in the late 1800s. Benjamin Disraeli and William Gladstone. When she left the table after dining with Gladstone, she said she thought HE was the cleverest man in England. When she dined with Disraeli, she left feeling like SHE was the cleverest woman in England. Disraeli was a brilliant listener and a master of something called the support response. When someone tells you something, only two things can happen: You either support what they say or shift the conversation away. The best conversationalists support what is said and dig for more information. Unfortunately, due to narcissism, a large percentage of people tend to shift the conversation away. Here are some examples: "Hey, we saw a great action movie this weekend." Response: "Oh, we hate action movies; we like romantic comedies" - Shift "I cooked the most perfect steak last night" Response: "Oh, we don't eat red meat" - Shift "I just finished reading the most amazing book" Response: Oh, what was the book? What did you like about it?" Support if you want people or customers to like you, you must get them to talk about themselves, and supporting what they say is the easiest way to do it.


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